Regretting doesn't help~

just seconds ago, i noticed that a company that i applied for a job sent me an email, asking me to attend an interview tomorrow. and after replying their mail, a call from another company asked me whether is it possible for me to attend an interview for Data Assistant post in their company. too bad i had to decline the offer because the office is in MidValley and they will be relocating to most probably PJ sometime later in this year.

and minutes ago before i check my inbox or receive that call, my sister deeply regret that i quit my first job. well, i guess she finds me being lazy and useless after all. but i regret it most than anyone. i shouldn't have believe their words (yes,my own family members' words) but i guess i couldn't help it.

i went to Kampar to convince my father and brother to let me study in a private institute in May. and with heavy heart, they let me. i know it's quite expensive but it's worth it. my career path is diverse and i would find a job in any sector. so i handed my resignation letter on 29th or March since i need to give a month of notice in prior. i was happy and decided to use my salary on buying my dream netbook (which i did xD). and then there was this MUNSYI exam from USM for whoever applied for any course on the university's site. it was a normal personality test but my family think i now have a chance to enrol in public university. i'm simply tired of explaining about the fact that i don't have enough CGPA to enroll in any course.

now i should have been in my class,studying or revising if i had registered for the May intake. damn. i miss studying so freaking much that i envious of my friends who had started studying in other private institute.

and to add more to my already-annoyed-and-miserable state is when one of my sister said i should just find a permanent job and postpone my studies for a while. i was totally dumbfounded that i didn't reply her text message. so this is what they think of me. a complete useless sister that is good for nothing. at the end of the day all that matters was my exam grades.

there are so many things i regret actually...

regret for letting my emotions control me when it shouldn't...

regret for not focusing in class...

regret for not seeking for help when i had problems...

regret for listening to my family members words and decided to wait for November intake...

regret that i'm not staying at my parent's...

and the list would go on~

but i want to design my own life. i want to take the decisions in certain matter. i might make the wrong choice/decision but i'm sure it will help me to improve myself~